Vampires don’t dream. Eric had known that for a thousand years. When he died for the day he went somewhere, but he didn’t dream. After the first hundred years he even stopped wondering where the somewhere was that he went. He lay down, he died, he rose, and he lived. These were the things that mattered. What happened in between, was unknowable, and therefore of no practical use to Eric Northman.
Since Vampires do not dream, interactions with their unconscious minds were different than with a sleeping mind. Sleeping minds are filled with riotous imagery and one off glitches that require processing and filing as part of the brains constant self-care routine.
Entering into Dreamland when a person was sleeping was akin to walking into Times Square on New Year’s Eve. There was a lot going on, you might or might not be seen or remembered, and anything you attempted to do would likely be erased from the chaos around you.
Vampire minds, in a resting state, are silent. There is no chaos, no competing cacophony of image and sound. When you draw the vampires resting attention, you have it all, and there is nowhere to hide.
Eric had just kissed Sookie and snuggled into her, spooning closely, and closed his eyes to die, when he found himself in what appeared to be a library. He was seated on a dark brown leather sofa, the lights were dim and across from him on a red velvet Queen Anne style chair, sat a dwarf. The walls were lined with books, but the room was not very large.
“I am the Keeper of Master’s Horses.” The Dwarf told him, keenly observing any and all of Eric’s responses. Eric, carefully took in his surroundings and tried to understand how he was here, when he had just been in bed with Sookie, about to die for the day. Dying was always fast, it was like he closed his eyes and then he was up again. Was he still dead? Had he been taken somewhere else while he rested? Where was Sookie? He called out in the bond for her, and also reached out with his mind.
He could feel her in the bond. She was an even line, so she was resting? Was she still sleeping in his arms, at Uppsala? Or had they been separated, and he taken elsewhere to rise, with her not knowing yet? He took comfort in her calm resting state, she was safe for the moment. He focused again on The Dwarf in front of him.
“Who is your Master?” Eric asked, feeling that was more relevant than why he had horses that needed to be kept.
“Not the Master that was Yesterday, nor the one that will be Tomorrow,” The Dwarf answered.
“What will bring this change?”
“Yourselves.” Yourselves? Did The Dwarf mean him and Sookie?
“What does it mean to be the Keeper of The Master’s Horses?” Eric tried a different tactic, pressing for information, and time to figure out where he was and how to get back to Uppsala.
“What does one do with Horses?” The Dwarf countered back. Eric’s mind raced through the options. You ride them, you feed them, you rub them…? What else was there to do with a horse?
Eric’s frustration was growing. He wanted to see Sookie and make sure she was ok, not play word games that seemed to go in circles. The Dwarf looked at him expectantly for a moment longer, and then his lips curled in disappointment and he shook his head.
Behind the chair where The Dwarf was seated he saw Sookie walk past. She seemed hurried and focused on her destination. Eric rose immediately to follow her, reaching out to her in the bond and with his mind, but she didn’t slow and in fact soon outpaced him.
As Eric chased after Sookie he saw that the room he had been in faded away and he found himself back the Wal-Mart in Kalispell. As he hurried to catch her, he noticed in the isles of the store were filled with familiar faces. They all seemed completely unaware that he was there. He was focused on catching Sookie, but he did spare a moment to wonder why everyone he had ever known was here, and why the fuck couldn’t he catch Sookie? She was fast, but she was not faster than him!
For just a moment he lost sight of her, and then he found himself at the front door of the Wal-Mart. Standing on a pier in front of the store was the Baroness von Blixen, holding open a large book in her hands. He stepped beside her, about to ask if she had seen Sookie go past here when he happened to look down at the pages of the book in her hands.
On its pages, Eric instinctively knew were the answers to every question he had ever had about anything. As he tried to read it, the words disappeared. He growled in frustration. The Baroness told him, not unsympathetically, “You will forget.”
“NO!” Eric’s denial thundered through the air. “I WILL REMEMBER!” She looked at him, not unkindly and shook her head as The Dwarf had done.
“Then have Sookie take you to The Library. There may be hope there.”
“Hope for, what? AND WHERE THE HELL IS SOOKIE?!?”
“Eric! Eric! I’m right here!” He felt her arms around him, and instinctively reached out to pull her closer. Burying his nose in her hair he took a long drag of her scent and felt himself calm down instantly. She was safe. Eric looked around and saw that they were still in their bed, in the underground chamber at Uppsala. His internal clock told him that there was still several hours to sunset, indicating that the day had passed while he was dead.
Sookie ran her fingers through his hair and looked at him with concern. “Eric, were you dreaming?”
“Vampires don’t dream, Sookie,” was his automatic response, and then he considered what had happened. What else would you call it?
“Then what happened, Eric?” The feeling of relief that he had, to have her in arms, unharmed was so tremendous that he didn’t answer her immediately. Instead he snuggled her closer, taking in more of her scent, and running his hands over her. Verifying not only the reality of her, but the fact that she was unharmed in any way. She only smelled of him, and Uppsala. They had been nowhere else, all day.
Eric pulled her into his mind and showed her what had happened. After he finished he opened his eyes and looked into hers. “Was that a dream, Sookie? The way you dream?”
“Yes, and no,” she looked into his eyes. “The lack of logic to questions, answers, places, actions that is consistent, but the clarity! No, I never have dreams that are that clear and vivid. You had a cable connection, I usually have to climb on the roof and move the antenna to even get a snowy picture.” Eric smiled at her visual comparison.
“Did you dream today, Sookie?” She nodded, settling her back to his chest, wanting to be closer to him, just because it made her feel good. “Can you remember any of it? Can you show me?” She nodded again, threading her fingers through his and pulling him into her mind.
The images were strange and fuzzy as she had warned. She was standing on her front porch, and Eric was there in the yard, walking toward her. Suddenly the ground had split apart, and fire had leaped up from the crack in the ground. Eric jumped back to avoid being burned and Sookie screamed his name, it sounded like her heart was breaking as she called to him.
Eric saw himself rise from the ground and try to get around the flames, but no matter how high he flew the flames just rose up, too. It ran as far as he could see, so he could not go over and he could not go around. He was standing in her yard, blood tears running down his face, while she cried for him on the porch. Someone said, “The ties that bind are also the ties that separate. This changes nothing.”
Feeling her through the bond as she remembered him not being able to get to her was painful for him. He pulled her tighter to his chest. Coming back to themselves he asked if she knew what the voice had meant. No, she thought to him. It felt like I lost you, Eric. You couldn’t get to me, and I didn’t think that you would ever be able to get to me, again. She paused there. I think I woke up before I did something really bad in my dream. I think if I lost you, it would be very bad. I would be very bad.
Shh, he consoled her, I will never leave you, Sookie. You don’t need to even think about it. You know you are stuck with me, right? He kissed her hair again, and ran his hands up and down her arms to warm her, and take away the gooseflesh he had seen rise there as she whispered to his mind her fear of losing him. He suppressed his own fear, wanting to be reassuring to her. The truth was though, these were more than dreams. First because vampires don’t dream, and second because his gut told him so.
Sookie, the Baroness said you knew about The Library. Do you know what she meant?
Yes, I think I do. Eric felt her uncertainty in the bond. He waited patiently for her to decide whether or not to go on. I used to have Dreams when I was a little girl Eric. I tried to talk to my Mom about them once, but she wouldn’t listen. She thought I was making it up and told me that bad things happened to girls who fibbed and told lies. Sookie stopped there, turning into Eric’s chest even more and burying her face in his neck. He could feel her tears, on his flesh before she started shaking in his arms.
What, Beloved? Tell me, please. He kissed her forehead over and over and rubbed her back to calm her.
I haven’t been to The Library in a long time, Eric. We remember the way, only together.
Eric, let that sink in a minute. We remember the way only together.
Does that mean that in order to remember how to get there, it will take all three of you? Sookie nodded. They had not discussed The Child, The Pixie and The Cast Iron Bitch before, but she had seen the doors in his memories, and his interactions with them up to that point, She was now consciously aware of what she had hidden from herself before, at least in part. Can you do it, Sookie? Can you bring yourself together to remember the way?
Is it important, Eric? Will it help keep you safe? He looked at her, this strangely odd and wonderful woman in his arms and kissed her softly on the lips.
I think it will keep us all safe, Beloved. She nodded, sniffing a little, and then she spoke for the first time in a long while.
“I need to eat something, Eric. Then I want to make love to you, to feed you, to feel close to you, and then we will go to The Library.” She stopped for a minute and then looked at him with older and wiser eyes than he had ever seen her have before. “It’s a long way, Eric. Are you sure?”
He wanted to sound sure, he wanted to play the Knight for her and protect her, but the truth was, he was on new ground here. He knew how to handle vampires, what motivated them, what moves he could expect when dealing with them. Were’s were also a known quantity. In fact, there was not much in this world that he had not met, mastered and conquered. Possibly, with the exception of the small woman who sat here with him.
Eric had told her after the shower where they had seen themselves over and over that he had spent some time studying parallel worlds, alternate realities and the like. He had in fact skimmed over his interest, feeling insecure in his knowledge, his thoughts and conclusions at the time. He still felt that way now. The truth was though, that his interest was in the fact that if they did exist, perhaps there was something new under their suns, something that had he not found, and mastered already. Something that inspired him to embrace life again and wake up to the possibility of not knowing every answer before the question was even asked in the first place.
That there was some meaning to all things that he had yet to discern. The pursuit of that meaning had become even more important with the loss of Godric. The physical need to pull back the cover and see the inner workings of things. To understand that patterns that ebb and flow around us, to look into The Abyss and let the fucker look into you, as long as it told you something that you didn’t know for your trouble.
“No,” he replied sighing and taking her hand. “I am not sure of anything at this point, and it makes me uncomfortable and a little angry. Being uncertain is not something I am accustomed to feeling.” She nodded, threading her fingers through his.
“Is that because you don’t know which self to be? Which Mask to wear?” He nodded. This was the first time she had brought this up since the afternoon in the training room. “I suspect that where we are going, you will need all yourselves, Eric, same as me.” He thought again of The Dwarf.
“What will bring this change?”
“What’s in The Library, Sookie?”
“Books. All the books ever created, and the ones yet to be made.”
“What does that mean?” he asked her, exasperated that now she was dodging his questions. Clearly she knew more, and clearly she was not coming up off it any more than The Dwarf or The Baroness had.
“I-…I don’t remember, Eric. I think I knew once, but now it’s no more than words to me either. Perhaps, we will find out together?” He nodded.
Upstairs, Sookie made a sandwich. They were nearly out of human food supplies which meant that soon they were headed back to Kalispell, if they were going to be staying here longer anyway.
She joined him in their office while she finished her meal and watched him log into Facebook. She giggled behind him as he posted an update on his status, noting that his name was Holly G. Lightly, and he was a twenty-one year old college grad touring Europe, keeping in touch as he traveled around. Her most recent stop was in Uppsala, Sweden, where she had been hanging for the last 2 weeks, partying with her friends and learning about Swedish culture.
Back home her friend Alice W. Hare commented on her updates every few days.
“This is how Pam and I keep in touch.”
“Cleverpuss,” she praised him as she slid around into his lap forcing him to tilt his head around to see the screen and to reach his arms around her body to type. She laid her head back on his shoulder and started nibbling on his neck, alternating baby kisses between nibbles. She shifted in his lap, to take advantage of the hardness she felt now beneath her bottom.
He made the SAS, and kept typing, though he did tilt his head to give her better access to his neck. She continued to moving in lap, lining up all the right places, and enjoying feeling his need for build in the bond. Finally, when he was done typing she stood and took his hand, leading him to their bedroom. She removed his jeans, and laid him face down on the bed. Removing her own clothes she sat astride his hips, leaning down and rubbing his shoulders, massaging his neck with her hands, as she hummed a soft tune for him.
Slowly, starting at the top she worked down his back, massaging him with her hands, placing a reverent kiss on each area of his body before moving on to the next muscle group. She kissed him between his shoulders, at the base of his spine, one for each of this very fine butt cheeks, smirking to herself as she worshipped that part of him. She kissed the back of each knee, running her hands up his long thighs, slowly warming his skin from the friction she created. The last thing she kissed was the soles of his feet. He jerked a little, and giggled. Yes, giggled. She looked up at him, not quite believing that sound had come from this huge man laying before her.
“It tickles,” he said by way of explanation, offering her a shy boyish grin with his confession. Her heart sped up, seeing him like that. She wanted to twine her fingers in his hair and kiss him until he forgot who he was. Then he could just be hers, forever. She sighed at the thought, and realized that she wanted all of him, still. As she had said. The glimpse of the boy she had just seen was beautiful beyond words, but he was only a small piece of the man she wanted, the man she needed, the man she loved.
Roll over, please. He rumbled for her again, deep in his chest, as he complied. When she heard that sound, it made her go gooey inside. She sat at the foot of the bed and admired him for a long time, rubbing his foot gently, not tickling him, but wanting to maintain contact as she drank in the appearance of him there, in her bed, aroused and waiting for her.
Finally she moved, massaging his feet, she kissed them each on the top as she had on the bottom, and then moved up his calves to his knees. When she got to his thighs, again she ran her hands up and down, warming him with the friction. She leaned forward and kissed his shaft, before taking the tip of him into her mouth, tonguing the head of him first and then the shaft, sucking gently.
Her hands rested flat on his hips as she worked the head of his cock, moaning at how good he tasted, how good felt in her mouth, how her need for him had escalated to the point that she was dripping on the sheets. The scent of her arousal caused Eric to start taking deeper breaths, and to moan for her as his need increased.
Her mouth was full of him, but she reached out with her mind. I love seeing you like this, Eric. Laid out before me like a banquet of all my favorite dishes, seeing you writhe from my touch. I especially like it when I touch you, and you make those sounds.
What sounds, lover? His fists clenched in the sheets again, as he tried to not thrust his hips. What she was doing was exquisite torture, he didn’t want her to stop, but the need to bury himself inside her and fill her with his seed in any way he could was nearly over taking him.
The ones that make me feel like I am doing something so right that surely no other woman has ever touched you like this before. That I know all the secret footpaths of your heart, and can show you things that even you have not dreamed of inside yourself. Those sounds, lover. He moaned again at her use of his pet name for her.
Let go, Eric. I want to pleasure you now, because what I have in mind is going to take a while. I need to know that I loved you well, first. She moved her mouth now with more purpose, pumping up and down on his shaft. His hips thrust mindlessly now, as she worked him, begging him to come for her. Please, Eric. I want to taste you so baaad….
Her voice in mind, her mouth on his cock were too much. He lost it. He screamed her name as he filled her, and she sent him love through the bond as she licked him clean. So good, Eric. “Mmmmmmm,” she moaned in her throat as she finished licking him clean. He was already hard again from her efforts.
She slid up his body now, kissing his belly button, rubbing his chest with her hands, letting her mouth follow where her hands had already been. She pulled his hands up and kissed each on, palm and then back before placing them on breasts. He cupped them and tweaked her nipples with his thumbs. It was her turn to moan.
Let me in, lover, he sent her. I want you to ride me like this until you come for me, I want to see your face as I pleasure you. Will you open for me, lover? Will you take me in? She growled now. His words in her mind stronger than anything else to her in that moment.
She opened her legs and slid him home, taking him easily she was so aroused. She moved on him for brief moment, feeling him fill her up, touch the bottom of her, and then a slight stinging that accompanied his entry into her body. It burned, so she shifted atop him, rubbing him on her inner walls, attempting to put the fire out or maybe build it higher. She no longer knew.
Her shifting on him, rubbing him this way, clenching him with her internal muscles was so slow and intense that he nearly came inside her again, as she worked to place him where she needed him the most. She wanted to find the angle that allowed him to touch all her secret inner places at once.
Finally, she found it. Sighing she said, “There, lover. Don’t move now, let me do it all. You just need to stay perfectly still.” She clenched herself around him then, and groaned as her inner muscles milked him, she shifted slightly, barely moving outside at all as her internal muscles stroked him. She came there on him, telling him how good he felt inside her as she let the orgasm sweep through her from head to toe. Love you, she chanted in her mind, and with her lips.
He watched her, hypnotized. With his vampire vision he saw her skin flush as thousands of blood vessels expanded beneath her skin when she peaked. Her head thrown back in ecstasy as she fought to hold onto him, to hold still while he was ravaged by her orgasm. She had found exactly where she wanted him to be inside her, and she was not about to let him go, too soon.
Eric was shaking with his own intense need, now. Seeing her, hearing her, feeling her, was causing a deep pain in his side as he held back his own orgasm. He was panting, though he needed no breath, trying to concentrate on his breathing rather than his aching need to split her open and just cover her in his semen.
He felt her reach out through the bond and pull some of that away from him, taking it herself, making it bearable to hold on longer, while she continued to hold him locked insider her this way. She shivered from his desire, and felt herself grow even wetter than she had been before.
It was all she was capable of sending now that she had taken the burden of desire for both of them. Rather than suppress it, she let herself climax, and she came around him again, he moaned and fought to stay still. These feelings she had created in him with what she was doing were so intense that he felt exposed and raw, and completely out of control. Normally he was pounding into her fighting to get deeper. Now he lay inside, her coiled around him and rubbing him so slowly and intimately she was peeling his sanity back one layer at a time.
How could she stand it? Gods, how could he?
Still holding him tight inside her, she leaned down now, laying herself on his chest. The change in her angle changed his position inside her and she gasped, her face sliding into ecstasy as she felt him in this new way. Tremors ran through her, and she whispered his name a prayer as she sought to tame her desire again.
This time, he rescued her through the bond, absorbing her need. It overwhelmed his control and he filled her with this seed while she continued to hold him inside. His cool offering allowing her a moments respite from the heat inside her, the ache in her muscles as she massaged him inside her, slowly, perfectly, barely moving on the outside at all, while inside the worked him over and over again. He was still hard.
She placed her mouth on his skin and kissed him softly, whispering, “I love you,” after each kiss. She mapped him this way, his head, his face, his shoulders, his mouth, sailing all the way to the edge of his sea blue eyes, while she somehow managed to squeeze him tighter, harder, to rub him in just the right way until he was shaking beneath her, coming apart. Not enough friction for release, but too much to pressure to let him retain his sanity.
Never in a thousand years had he been loved like this.
He wanted to last for another thousand at least.
She tilted her head then, bringing his mouth to her neck, sending him love and caring as she offered to feed him.
I can’t, Sookie. His mental voice sounded strangled with the passion she would not give him just enough pressure to release. It’s too much. I might go too far.
No, she told him, squeezing him slowly inside her. You won’t. I trust you, Eric. He moaned, his last thought being he hoped she was right and then he sank his fangs into her.
Her blood rolled over his tongue as her hips relaxed and began to roll over his providing that much needed friction at long last. He filled her as she filled him. He growled and pulled her closer, sucking deeply from her neck, pressing deeply between her thighs.
She came for him again, too then, as he took his fill of her. He drank deep and long and when he was finally able to make himself stop he ripped open his wrist to feed her. She took several long pulls, her eyes rolling back in her head and then she let his wrist heal.
They stayed there for a while reassuring each other that they had just experienced had been real.
Was it really, good, Eric? The shyness in her tone cutting a piece of flesh from his dead heart.
Why do you worry, Beloved? Could you not feel what you were doing to me?
She nodded. Sometimes I think that there is nothing I can do for you that hasn’t already been done a thousand times, by someone else. How can I can I please you? Anything I do you have had done by others. Others who were probably better at it than me.
Sookie, if I gave you a rose, and some guy you met tonight in a bar gave you a car, which would mean more to you?
Because it came from you. He smiled.
You are very lucky, Beloved, in that you have never experienced sex without love. Each time you have engaged in physical pleasure you have had an emotional attachment of some kind to your partner. That produces a very different experience than you might have with someone you cared nothing for, no matter what they were doing to your body.
You are not only the queen of my heart, Miss Stackhouse, you also have one damned fine imagination! Even if we had another thousand years together, I don’t think you would ever run out of ways to please and surprise me! She smiled at him, thinking for the first time that maybe she had been lucky after all, with this at least.
Seeing her smile, he gently laid her on the bed, spooning her from behind as she slid as close to him as she could get. She took both of his hands in hers, pulling his arms around her, his body around hers. She laced her fingers with his and pulled him into her mind.
It was time to go to The Library.